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“I’m Just a FAT Girl”

“I’m Just a FAT Girl”

Eboni Lacey 2015I’ve always wanted to do this. I’ve even dreamed about it. I keep wondering when someone is going to step up to the plate and tackle this battle. But since it hasn’t been done yet, maybe this is my personal mission.

So, hear it goes.

Why the hell is “Fat” still a word? I find it to be the WORST insult any female can ever receive. It’s funny how “Bitch” “Slut” “THOT” “Hoe” or even “Cunt” mean nothing, but the word fat means everything to a woman.

I still see girls spiral into anger or cry their eyes out when they are called “Fat.” It hurts women’s feelings and creates the worst kind of pain – insecurity and body hatred. Young girls have even committed suicide because of being called fat. Fat creates an unspeakable competition where women are judged by their figure and the sizes of their pants. Fat has been the epitome of fad diets and starvation. It’s crazy the type of impact one little three letter word has.

The Identity of SheI’m remember the first time I was called “Fat.” I was in the 5th grade and was arguing with some loud mouth girl that always wore the same clothes and hair style to school everyday. (No shade, just a fact.) I heard she was talking shit about me so I addressed her like a grown-ass woman, even though I was just an 11-year old little girl. I called her “bun butt Nelly” and she called me “Fat Fat Eboni.”

I then called her a “selfish skank” and watched everyone point and laugh at her as she walked away. Even though I got the last word, that damn fat word continued to stay in my mind and that shit never went away.

From that very moment, little Eboni had developed a certain disdain for her body. I felt that I was only pretty if I was a certain size. I was only athletic if I was a certain weight. And, if I didn’t maintain that weight, then I had to do whatever it took to be that size.

So, I developed an eating disorder. I grew addicted to diet pills and even started smoking as it helped curve my appetite.

It’s crazy how one word can turn a little happy girl into a body-crazed obsessive woman.

I think it’s time to do away with the word – it’s not like it’s helping anybody. I would hate for any more young girls to get depressed or kill themselves (sadly, it happens all the time) just because of such an ignorant word.

See, skinny girls may not know this but the life of a “Fat” girl is an incredibly hard one to live. Nobody understands your story, except other Fat girls. Everyone else just thinks that not being fat is easy.

“Just work out,” they say. (Bitch, don’t you think I do that!”)

“Just cut out dairy.” (Do you cut out diary?)

“Just don’t eat that much.” (Sorry Twiggy, but I’m not trying to starve. First off, starving is unhealthy. Trust me, I’ve tried it. If I want a steak, I’m going to eat a steak. I don’t give a F***!)

People tend to discredit the “Fat” girl thinking that because she isn’t a twig, she must not know how to control herself in real life. They tend to focus on her weight rather than her talent. Just take Adele for example, who was told that she should focus on losing weight before making music. Her response was priceless.

“I don’t make music for eyes.”

It’s crazy that weight in general causes such credit and discredit. A ugly girl with a beautiful body is a dime-piece, but a beautiful girl that’s slightly overweight is constantly told, “Oh you’re pretty, for a big girl.”

No bitch, I’m pretty let’s get that straight.

Then there’s also the common misconception that a fat girl knows nothing about fitness. People think that she just sits up and eats burgers and pizza all damn day long. She tells people about how important veggies are and how much she loves working out, and people look at her with that “how should you know” face. Meanwhile, a skinny girl could stuff donuts in her mouth every waking minute and only put on gym shoes for an Instagram photo. Yet the minute she posts one photo of herself doing one squat, she suddenly becomes the next Jillian Michaels.

As a feminist, we can’t give into this bullshit. We’ve got to appreciate all women and all bodies. Not every size 2 girl is fit and not even big girl is “fat.”

Let’s take a vow to redefine the word “fat” and make it as mundane as the word “bitch.” Maybe we can use it as a term of endearment, or maybe we can just do away with the word completely. Delete it from vocabulary and restore the appropriate words that we should use when referring to other women.

Calling someone fat doesn’t make you skinny, so what’s the point of using it anyway. Don’t be the insecure girl – be the confident woman that appreciates all women for the different bodies, cultures, personalities and identities that we all have.

Stand with me in eliminating this word. Take the “Fat” pledge by emailing theidentityofshe@gmail.com.

I can’t wait until this dream becomes true and another little girl can feel confident in her own skin, no matter her size.